Death Pools

 Death pools have been popular since Bob Hope hit 90. Everyone was shocked that he wasn't dead yet. I would have conversations about him and people would be flabbergasted. "You mean he's not dead yet?", they would retort. Eventually he did leave this mortal coil, but not before ruining many death pools by outliving many stars expected to outlive him by decades. Traditionally you want to bet on a really old celeb, someone in a destructive, drug fueled tailspin, or a rapper. Right now you might want Lil Wayne, Lindsay Lohan or Queen Elizabeth. They are all drugs!

Right now my money's on Betty White. She's really, really, really ooooollldddd. Plus her schedule is more packed than ever. She has to give in soon. The one on the bubble is Dick Clark. He had a stroke and is never seen in public except for that horrible New Years Eve show. The variable is his bank account. Dude has about a kajillion dollars that could aid in keeping him alive well past 200. I say 50/50 for about the next ten years.

Dick Cheney? Bad bet. This guy is prehistoric and post historic. He'll be laughing at this blog after googling his name sometime in the year 3085. Do not take him in a death pool. He might get elected to the White House in the next 20 years, though.